A trip to Michael's --> Centerpieces!

I am really excited to report that we have figured out the centerpieces with the help of my lifelong friend, Mic who was visiting this weekend from Arizona. She is DIY queen and so creative... we went to Michael's over the weekend and spent about 4 HOURS sitting on the floor in the Holiday aisle sifting through almost ALL of the purple, green and silver sparkly flowers and leaves that Michael's had to offer. We lay them out on the  the floor. Seriously, the floor was covered with sparkle... glitter. Impossible to traverse (we scared off a few customers, I think).  But, we got what we needed! 

The colors match my daughters bat mitzvah dress --- purple and  silver and we added a nice green as a complimentary color.

After four hours, we settled on an overflowing cart full of glittery flowers, took them and and then, collapsed.

The Big BM

Well, things are moving along on the Bat Mitzvah front. We are five weeks away. It is very soon. Sooner than I think. Sooner than I want.

Ke'alohi has made some headway studying and practicing the prayers and her torah portion.  The rabbi came over today to talk with us about how she is doing. Together, she and he basically ran through most of the service sitting on our living room couch. She did all the prayers very well... chanting them all. She read her torah portion - as much as she knows. She's still reading with the vowels, so she'll have to switch soon and then practice, practice, practice. She's got a lovely voice and is very musical so she wants to chant the torah portion (as well as the rest of the service).  The rabbi, in his humor, reminded her that whatever she does, the most important thing she has to remember is that she has to make him look good the day of the service. So, if she's practicing and asks herself, "Am I ready to make the rabbi look good?" and the answer is yes, she should practice for five more minutes. If the answer is no, she should practice for ten more minutes. Pretty funny. 

We also talked about some of the pre-service tasks and day-of logistics. We are a congregation without a building, so there is some moving of the torah that has to happen... from one location to another (fortunately, there is a daytime mitzvah, so the rabbi will be bringing the Torah to our service). My daughter is making her own prayer book using a Hebrew word processing program, and we will need to print them for all guests at the service. That seems like a lot of ink on paper... not so good for the environment. We talked about a greener way to do this -- maybe projecting the prayerbook onto a few big screens? It'd be nice if we could rent Kindles and give them to guests, but it is prohibitively expensive... still thinking of a solution for this, but we may end up printing them.

I am happy to report I can check off a few more items from the list of things I had in  August (and I've got a few more to add...)

Completed:

• Met with hotel catering to talk about timing of cocktails, dinner, dancing and room set-up and to pick menu (OK, the menu is not completely decided, but it's 90% -- we do need to settle on the MAIN entree for adults, though!)
• Address and send invitations
• Settled on a mitzvah project! -- My daughter loves to read, so she's decided to collect new and gently used books for preschool thru 8th grade kids for the non-profit organization Book Work Angels.  This organization creates lending libraries in Chicago public schools where the majority of kids read below their grade level.
• Figured out table centerpieces / decoration for the room - We decided on using some of the donated books to create our centerpieces. We'll stack books by theme (hopefully!), such as "ABC" or "Harry Potter", "Dr. Seuss", "The Magic Schoolbus", etc. and wrap them with pretty purple and green ribbon and put them in the center of the table with flowers and candles.  We thought we'd use the theme to "name" the tables and we'll use those names on place cards.
• Sunday Brunch - is now scheduled... and invites have gone out.

In Progress:

• Write Dvar Torah and practice!
• Finish creating prayer book and print
• Get and make place cards for tables
• Figure out party favor for the kids -- and order it
• Order some "prizes" for kids for dances
• Guest book for people to sign
• Assign tables for adults (kids will all sit at one large L-shaped table)
• Meet with DJ to talk about songs, party tone, etc.

I must say this has been a fairly emotional journey. I've lost sleep over it... sometimes thinking that this is an extravagant, silly endeavor and wondering WHY on earth we are doing it (it's like a wedding!) Other times, when I hear from my cousins who I have not seen in years and live far away and my great aunts and uncles who are planning to attend, I feel good about getting the family together for a happy event.

That said, I don't think we'll do it this way again for the other two kids. I'd be just fine with having a smaller, friends-only event for them... fair or not... or taking a family trip, or sending them on a trip. Doing it once with all the relatives from near and far seems reasonable, but doing it again in 2 years when my second daughter turns 13 feels overwhelming. I'll have to remember I felt this way 2 years from now (hence, the Blog!)

So, final question is... Main Entree, what to choose?? Here are our (in-budget) choices... we can choose one plus an option for vegetarians OR we can choose two but would need to ask all guests which they want to choose before the event (via e-mail at this point...)  These choices are only for adults. The kids will have an Italian buffet with pasta, pizza, salad, and garlic bread.

1. Chicken Wellington, French Beans, Port Wine Fig Sauce 
2. Beef Tenderloin, Rosemary Duchess Potatoes and Cabernet Demi-Glaze
3. French Breast of Chicken Topped with Grilled Apple and Brie, Sweet Potato Mashed, Pinot Noir Jus
4. Grilled Salmon Pesto Orzo, Roasted Red Pepper Sauce, Vegetable Bundle
5. Pan Seared Halibut, White Bean and Roasted Garlic Puree, Roasted Red & Yellow Pepper Piperade
6. Beef Wellington with a Cabernet Sauce, and Asparagus
7. Pistachio Seared Sea Bass, Shrimp Potato Hash, Yellow Pepper and Smoked Paprika Butte

What's your vote??

Where is God?

My 4-year-old son has been talking a lot about God lately. It's curious to me. I am enjoying his discovery... and am fascinated and empathetic with his struggle to understand.  When I walked into his room the other day, he was talking quietly to his dress; his face one inch from the front of the dresser drawer:

"God? Are you there? Can you hear me? If you're there, say something. [a few seconds pass...] I can't hear you, God. Really, if you're there, say something. [seconds pass again] (irritated) Mom! Why doesn't God ever talk to me? He is supposed to be in everything and everywhere but I can never hear him!"

Then, yesterday he asked me whether God was really everywhere and in everything - as in literally. We were staying at a cottage by a small lake in Michigan and we'd been fishing. He had caught a large fish and we had cooked it on the grill.

"Mom, is God everywhere? How come I can't see him? Is he in the lake? Is he in the fish? If he's in the fish, does that mean I ate him for lunch?"

So many questions... so much curiosity...

Bat Mtizvah party decorations

Well, here I am, two months later and still not sure how to decorate the room. I've got a few ideas by looking at Rachel Ray's website. She's got a great resource for centerpieces -- with bright color photos. The ideas are from very simple and budget conscious to more extravagant.  

I also like the idea of creating the centerpiece during the course of the party by tying it to her mitzvah project... (that'll also get her to start thinking about what she wants to do for that!)  I know that our local food shelter is always in need... that's an "easy" one. But, I would like Ke'alohi to spend a little time thinking about what she wants -- getting to know herself. Her project should be an expression of herself... not anything that her parents come up with.

I'm getting a little nervous because it is getting closer!  Here are a few things I have done. I need to acknowledge my accomplishments instead of only focusing on what is still a work in progress!)

Completed:

• The service venue is booked!
• The party venue is booked!
• Sent out a Save the Date card with hotel info for out of town guests
• We have a block of rooms booked for out of town guests
• Transportation to the party from the bat mitzvah has been arranged for the kids
• Dresses for the service and party have been bought for my two daughters
• We've booked the band.
• We ordered and received the invitations.

What's Left:

• Figure out table centerpieces / decoration for the room
• Talk to the band about timing for music
• Coordinate with the hotel timing for appetizers, dinner, room-set-up
• Get and make place cards for tables
• Figure out party favor for the kids -- and order it
• Order some "prizes" for kids for dances
• Guest book for people to sign
• Maybe some kind of sign for when they enter the party with my daughter's name?
• Print addresses and send invitations
• Settle on a BM project!
• My daughter needs to practice her torah portion in front of people and Practice, practice, practice
• Talk to my parents about the Sunday brunch they are hosting the next day. Offer to pay for it, in part or get flowers for it?

Not sure

• I'm not sure if we need to order yamulkas?

On party decorations for a Tween/Adult Bat Mitzvah

My daughter's bat mitzvah is coming up in five months and I've been looking for decorations. I started by doing searches in Flickr, the photo site for parties and bat mitzvahs. I also did Google images searches. I also roamed the streets of downtown Chicago during my lunch hour looking at store window displays. That's where I found the most inspiration.

Nothing scares me more than having one of those bat mitzvah parties with large, neon colored table centerpieces of a soccer ball or movie clip. I mean really... YUCK. That said -- my 12-year-old just loves the 80s neon colors and is all about big and loud. So, how do we come to some agreement?  

Last week I was out on State Street in Chicago and wandered into the new Anthroplogie retail store. Anthropologie is one of my favorite places to look around. I love the sense of design in the housewares, clothing and I especially love their store displays. They are so creative and whimsical. 

 

At the Chicago store, there was a display made of plastic bottles that had been cut and spray painted to look like flowers.  They were tied to string and hanging from the ceiling over a large table of housewares. Wow. Just beautiful. 

Trying to Keep the Bat Mitzvah Real

My oldest daughter is 12 and a half and five months away from her Bat Mtizvah. The whole experience has been strange and interesting... just the thought of being old enough to have a daughter preparing for this rite of passage makes me feel a bit, squirmy. I had one myself. It was a bit of an obligation. I tried to give my daughter a choice, but honestly, I'm not sure whether she thinks she had one. I hope she feels that way. I will have to ask her. 

The preparations are really scant so far. We've reserved the space for the service -- it is at the community center where we go every Sunday for a family service. It's a beautiful room and meaningful to us. We've reserved the place for the public celebration of her achievement -- it's at a hotel. Not my first choice. I prefer a more intimate location with more interesting architecture, but to my lovely tween, it seems grown-up and glamorous. For me, it is more convenient -- I have just one person to talk to there for food, drinks, tables, chairs, silver, china, glassware, etc. We still have much to do and I've decided to start this blog I've been thinking of for... a few years?!... to document our experience and thoughts about it. I'm hoping I continue it after the big event, as I've been meaning to do this for a while. I'm doing it in part to keep track of our ideas and thoughts... and in part as a remembrance for my daughter. Maybe it'll help a few others out there, as well.

How do we want to recognize and celebrate this rite of passage? Writing it down should help in finding direction and making decisions. I hope. I am trying to keep it focused more on the the joy and our love for her and less on the party and all of its accouterments. Funny, I myself have not been to a b'nai mitzvah in many years, though we have a few coming up. I've heard that they've gone a bit haywire -- in terms of themes and cost. I don't want to go there. Don't want to get caught up in the gimmicks, as tempting as they will be to the tween crowd. Onward.